Word to the Wise
Friday, August 17, 2007 - Nineteenth Friday in Ordinary Time
[Joshua 24:1-13 and Matthew 19:3-12]Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and tested him saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever?" He said in reply, "have you not read that from the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate."
What starts out as an argument among the Pharisees about a text in Deuteronomy 24:1 about divorce ends with Jesus removing the argument entirely by saying that the governing text is in Genesis, not in Deuteronomy! Previous practice was simply a concession to human weakness on the part of Moses! Jesus makes no such concession. This weekend I will be witnessing the marriage of my grandnephew and his fiancee in Grand Coteau, Louisiana. It is truly my hope and prayer that they will have a long and very happy life together. Since they are rather young (20 each), that could be a long life indeed! When I get back here to KY, I expect to find a box of annulment cases to review from the Appellate Matrimonial Tribunal of Texas. Those cases show me on many different levels why some marriages "succeed" and some "fail." Most of the time it seems to me that the couples get married for all the wrong reasons. There's no point in going down the list of reasons, but suffice it to say, rarely do I see anyone give a theological reason. In short, the SACRAMENT of Marriage gets short shrift. Individualism plays a large role in marriage difficulties. It is hard for someone in our culture to accept the fact that they do owe "obedience" to the person they marry. They do have to be celibate in regard to all other persons. They cannot continue to live as a single person as if their spouse is little more than a long term roommate! They do have to see love as more than sexual attraction. If they see their love as a reflection of God's love, then their marriage becomes a ministry, not only between the two of them or to their children, but to all of us. A sacrament is an encounter with Christ. If a married couple cannot bring themselves to see Christ in one another, no matter how difficult things can get, then the spouse simply becomes a convenient or inconvenient "other" to be connected with or not according to passing likes and dislikes. This turns marriage into a consumer product. I am blessed with the wonderful examples of many couples whose weddings I have celebrated. Over the years I have had the opportunity to help some of them through some very rough times. Ultimately, it seems to me that they must have faith in God and trust in one another. They have to put the marriage ahead of career or even the children. If the marriage is a faithful love in Christ, careers and kids will benefit mightily. It doesn't work any other way. Jesus' refusal to accept divorce as a given is part of the demand of discipleship that includes the Sermon on the Mount. Marriage is a matter of discipleship, not cultural convenience. It is not just a long term romance, but a powerful preaching of God's love. AMEN
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