Word to the Wise
Friday, June 10, 2011 - 7th Week of Easter - Fri
[Acts 25:13b-21 and John 21:15-19,927]Amen, amen, I say to you, when you were younger, you used to dress yourself and go where you wanted; but when you grow old, you will stretch out your hands, and someone else will dress you and lead you where you do not want to go.
Jesus speaks these words to Peter after charging him to "feed my sheep!" The gospel author interprets them as a warning to Peter about the way he would eventually be martyred for the sake of the gospel. At the same time, I find them singularly appropriate as a meditation on the challenge of growing elderly! I occasionally get questions from concerned friends about "retirement." They will hear that a bishop or their local pastor is retiring (as required by canon law at age 75), and they wonder what a priest who belongs to a religious order "does about retirement." The answer in my case (and generally for us Dominicans) is "not much." We use the term "limited service" to describe the situation when age or health no longer permits a brother to engage in a full time ministry. We continue to live religious life and "help out" as long as we can. We do have a nursing care facility for brothers who need assistance on a regular basis. I am on the board of trustees of the fund that supports these brothers, so I am aware of how these matters are managed for our particular Dominican province.
What I have just said explains briefly the "mechanics" of growing elderly in ministry but does not address the physical and emotional challenges of Jesus' statement. His words go directly to the issue. There is a loss of independence that comes with declining health and the decisions that must be made, sometimes unwelcome decisions. Superiors regularly report how hard it is to tell a brother he can no longer drive! Children know that moment with elderly parents! I recall, too, the elderly sisters in KY, where I worked for four years, when the moment came for them to move from the "motherhouse" to the nursing facility next door, and the impact of that very short trip. There will come a day when I, if I live long enough (I'm 68 now), will face a similar decision. I am still able to travel and preach to congregations. There will come a time when this keyboard may be the major and only form of preaching for me. The longer lives that health care science now is offering, along with all the fuss over the reform of Medicare and Medicaid, does not make the meditation any easier. One of the psalms has this line, "Now that I am old and grey, O Lord, forget me not!" I am praying that no matter how forgetful I will become, that the Lord does not suffer the same affliction. I am also praying for the "grace" to grow older "gracefully!" AMEN