Word to the Wise
Friday, August 12, 2011 - Friday in the 19th Week in Ordinary Time
[Josh 24:1-13 and Matt 19:3-12,1041]Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, 'For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh?' So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore , what God has joined together, man must not separate.
It is always with a sense of dread that I approach the gospel passage that appears today. No congregation is divorce-free. Even the Pharisees were aware of that. They are as astonished as the disciples! Perhaps some of THEM were divorced! This may have been more than a matter of interpretation of the Mosaic Law, which Jesus, in this passage, simply says that even Moses disregarded because he allowed divorce because of their "hardness of heart!" Jesus' own teaching begins with the original plan and bases it all on the original plan of the Creator!
My many years in campus ministry mean that I have officiated at a lot of weddings. I'm still doing that! I try to see that the couple are well-prepared, although I think the preparation is simply a way of getting them "started." I pray for their happiness and a long life together. It will take effort - lots of effort. It always has required lots of effort! This is why the Pharisees' question about divorcing for any reason whatever seems rather modern. In addition to my wedding ministry, I also serve as a "defender of the bond in second instance for the Appellate Matrimonial Tribunal of the Dioceses of the State of Texas." That ponderous title means that I am part of a process whereby a person is seeking to remarry in the church after having been divorced civilly. The theoretical basis of this is that they believe their former marriage(s) was not "valid" - not a true sacramental marriage. While this ministry is important, it is not a happy experience for me. I see too many marriages entered without adequate preparation and too many ended without making the effort required to live a life together till death do us part!
So, I am involved at the beginning and the "end" of many marriages. I remain convinced that Jesus' teaching is the only way to success in marriage. Prepare well and make an effort. Faith tells us that marriage is a sacred event - a sacrament. Faith and love should be the binding force and hope should be the daily motivator! AMEN