Word to the Wise
Friday, August 16, 2019 - Friday in the 19th Week in Ordinary Time
[Josh 24:1-13 and Matt 19:3-12]Some Pharisees approached Jesus, and tested him, saying, "Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any cause whatever." He said in reply, "Have you not read that from the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? Therefore, what God has joined together, man must not separate." [Matthew]
In my now forty-eight years as an ordained priest I have presided at many weddings. Some of these marriages have ended in divorce. When the marriage in question was between two people who had been active in the campus ministries I have served, I have asked myself what I could have done that might have prevented an ultimate sad outcome. Even with all the preparation required by the Church nowadays, the statistics for marriages in the Catholic Church are not much better than in the general public, which is nearly 50% failure!
Jesus teaches us that human marriage is something more than mating to continue the species. We are all made in the image and likeness of God. Therefore his answer to the Pharisees (who presumed the legitimacy of divorce because it was allowed under Moses) goes back to the original intent of God. In other words, Jesus rejects the presumption of divorce. This teaching astounds his own disciples. They would have known about the Mosaic Law on this. Perhaps some of them were already divorced? (Not to mention the fact that women had no rights in this regard, only men!)
Pastoral ministry to divorced and remarried people has been highlighted in recent years because of Pope Francis' urging that the church be more compassionate and helpful in finding ways to heal and restore lost members because of divorce. What I am hoping for is a better way to prepare couples in the first place. The marriages that I have seen that seem the healthiest are those that are based on real friendship, not just mutual attraction. Our Church still has a long ways to go in making Jesus' vision become better than a 50-50 chance of happening! AMEN